After fourteen years of marriage, Pilar and Deion Sanders are now embroiled i
n one of the ugliest divorces in sports history. News of the once happy couple’s split made headlines late last year, and since then, rumors and accusations of abuse and infidelity have taken center stage as the duo battle over custody of their three children and a massive $250 million estate.
Deion, who currently works as a NFL Network analyst, hasn’t hesitated to talk about the drama and Pilar (most recently calling her the “ultimate gold digger”) in interviews and on social networking sites, but as the cliché goes, there’s two sides to every story. I recently got the chance to talk very candidly with Pilar about this very messy situation, and whether you’re Team Pilar or Team Deion, the interview is a must read. Check out what she said about Deion not paying child support, abuse, and the role she played in building the Deion Sanders brand below.
Late last year, rumors emerged that Deion was having an affair with a 19-year-old. The girl said in an interview in October that the relationship was not sexual. Do you believe her?
PS: The pictures, they speak for themselves. I don’t really speculate, I know what I saw, I know what everyone else saw. So, that says otherwise.
The girl also said she had to Google Deion to find out who he was, but denies knowing he was a married man.
PS: Yeah, after 14-years of marriage and a family show, I’m sure it’s kind of hard not to find me next to him.
You’ve accused Deion of being abusive in the past, including physical and verbal abusive. Can you give our readers a specific instance of this abuse?
PS: Most recently, every picture on the web would show that my arm was broken and he busted my thumb in attempts to knock me out, kill me, yeah. And maybe, perhaps, people will believe it more so now, that, unfortunately, they were seeing this season. The very drastic increase of athletes, football players who snap, and unfortunately, take their lives and other people’s lives with them. It’s not that far off, it’s not uncommon among athletes. It’s very, very, very not uncommon when you speak with other NFL wives, football wives, athletes’ wives.
I remember you being photographed wearing a cast after the situation that occurred at the house you once shared during which he’s accused you and a friend of jumping him. Can you tell us exactly what happened in the house that day?
PS: You know what, I’m 129 pounds, okay. He has been trained all his life to play baseball and to attack people. Football, you’re running, you’re grabbing; it’s a very violent sport. What kind of sense would it make for me at 5’9″, 129 pounds to attack someone his size? That just doesn’t make sense. And for what? No, not at all.
But you did have a friend with you?
PS: A friend was with me. She was in the house gathering up some things and helping me out, but no, she didn’t attack him at all. Neither did I.
Just to paint a clear picture of what you’re saying happened, he was the one that was confrontational and put his hands on you while you were in the house getting some of your things.
PS: I clearly didn’t break my own arm, or thumb. We had video to prove it. Why would someone destroy evidence if they weren’t guilty. We can look at the factual things that have happened. Why destroy the phone that was videotaping everything that happened? When my girlfriend ran down the stairs after she heard banging and screaming and such. She caught him on tape doing that stuff. Why destroy the tape if you weren’t doing anything?
You were charged with attacking him in that situation. What’s happened so far with that case?
PS: We’re still in the middle of it. Wrongfully labeled as attacking him mind you. Collin County, our county’s law states that if anyone is called to a home on domestic violence, that automatically, no matter who calls, the man is taken out of the house, period. No questions, no whatever, the man is just taken out of that house. Now if there’s a sign of blood or a sign of injury on anyone, including the woman, then the man is taken and removed from the home for 24 hours. This is a county and state law. When the police arrived to my home, they saw blood all over me, all over our floor, they saw blood and matter, just meat hanging from my hand. They removed me, they forced myself and my friend out of the home. That was wrong right there. So on so many counts, the police didn’t follow what they were suppose to do, but it was all planned. They had been there earlier that day, talked about it. I mean there is a tape where you can hear Deion telling the police these things.
You’re saying Deion and the police conspired to do those things?
PS: More than that, absolutely. They certainly didn’t abide by their pledges or the laws they are given to follow, I do know that.
Give us an update of what’s happening now. He has custody of your two sons, but you still have your daughter. Is that correct?
PS: Yes and no. It’s kind of a tough situation. What Deion has done was, he’s made a consistent habit of , since our divorce, throughout our divorce, to take my boys, even when we were living together, and basically kidnap them. Take them without me knowing, remove them from school without my knowledge, or ability to get in touch with them to speak with them for days on end. I mean this has been going on for months. The DA was involved, the police, lawyers, the court, so, unfortunately his yellow jacket [Hall of Fame jacket] affords him immunity. So many of the rules and orders that us regular folk have to abide by and do…something he would normally be punished for or a man would normally be punished for, he’s basically rewarded. So by him taking, sequestering my boys, not adhering to any of our possession orders, and the judge not really looking into it and not really understanding the complexity of his mind or situation. Normally you would think you’re dealing with normal people who really want the best interest of their children to spring forth and to lead, but it’s not always the case, and in this case, it’s not. So by him taking my children and acting as if yes, I have custody of them, and they’re mine, they’re mine, they’re mine, especially over the holidays, the judge said, “well, since they’re with you, you have them, and since the girl is with you, you have her.”
So, I mean I’ve had my boys, Deion has not stuck to the possession schedule, I’ve never kept my children from him, however, he has done that to me. Regardless of the fighting, regardless of how much he’s slandered my name and just called me all kinds of things, I’ve never kept my children from their dad, and I’ve never made it appear to be that way, so that’s not what I want my children to know, I don’t want them to remember their mother ever doing, but sooner or later they’re going to grow up. They’re old enough to read and understand and see things now, so they’ve seen a lot, they understand a lot. but when it comes time for them to date and enter relationships and understand complexities of life, they’ll put it together.
As far as child support goes, you supposedly were getting $10,500 per month. Were you actually getting child support from him?
PS: I was never, ever, ever once paid child support, at all. Never once. And I’ve seen his statement saying “and I have the canceled checks to prove it,” but he never showed it, now did he? He never showed you one of his canceled checks of child support that he’s paid, did he? Absolutely not, and he won’t because he hasn’t.
I’m glad to be getting your side of the story because as the saying goes, there are two sides to every story. Because he is who he is, we tend to always hear his side.
PS: Exactly, and he became who he is not by his own merit, he became who he is by the grace of God and by the grace of God putting me with him because let me tell you sweetheart, out of the 14 years that mama’s been home, I haven’t been sitting around eating bon bons, I’ve been building our family brand. I’ve been building up Deion Sanders because why not? He’s my husband. You’re the brand we can market the most and market right now. So once you think you got your feet down and your ears dry, you want to go act a fool. Okay, go ahead, but you know, you’ve got to answer to somebody.
So basically, you were his partner in every way.
PS: No, no, no, no, no, partner? Ride-or-die partner. Yes ma’am, absolutely. One hundred percent, I’m not just a baby machine. Uh uh, no, mama held down the fort nice and strong.
Your attorney is trying to have your marriage annulled. That’s very unusual for a marriage that’s lasted 14 years. Typically, people who’ve been married a short length time seek out annulments, and they’re usually given for reasons such as fraud and concealment. What reason applies to your situation?
PS: Everything that you just mentioned. It’ll definitely be out; it’s already been out in a courtroom so
it’s not a secret, but the document was something his attorneys drew up.
And that’s the prenup you’re referring to, right?
PS: Absolutely. His attorneys drew that up.
The prenup gives you one million dollars and a $100,000, or something like that? [publicist adds 'signing bonus', as it's being reported in the media]
PS: No, it’s not even any of that. They thought they would make a joke out of it and label it as such, but no. We don’t even need to really go into that because it’s really not valid. It’s not a valid agreement number one. However, if by some stretch of the imagination you want to deem it valid, okay, it’s valid. The document itself says ‘and cause for grounds of an annulment’, now that’s something that his attorney came up with, not mine.
Why do you say the prenup isn’t valid? Did you not read it all? What about it isn’t valid?
PS: I was able to read the pages that were presented to me, I was not able to read the pages that were added after I signed it. Yeah, certain things I didn’t know about.
Typically when you have a legal document like that, you have to initial beside the clauses on each page.
PS: You hit the nail right on the head. You certainly do, and if you don’t initial it, usually it’s just not initialed. But in cases where you have people who operate with power and money, and who are used to getting what they want, however they want, and it will be done however they want it to be done, if you don’t take the steps to initial, I guess they’re just going to do it for you, and that’s what happened in my case, without my knowledge.
You’re saying that not only were pages added after the fact, but your initials were forged?
PS: Oh absolutely.
When it’s all said and done, what do you want from the divorce?
PS: Freedom. I just want to live my life with my babies, and do everything they’ve always wanted to do. I teach no limits, I teach them to dream, I teach them to live life and have fun. To not live in a bubble where they have to feel they have to act a certain way or be a certain way. I want them to experience different cultures, to appreciate the beauty God created in different cultures, different lands, different foods, different languages. All of that. My oldest son is very much into music production. You might hear the music right now. He’s creating beats from tracks. He’s like a little genius; he picks up on anything and everything just immediately. He’s into skateboarding and plays the trumpet and piano. My other son does the piano and wants to do the trumpet, and sports. That’s something that comes very natural for all of them, including my daughter. The athletics are there. They’re very bright. They speak Spanish, they want to learn other languages. I just want them to be able to live a full rich life, and rich in all of its grandiose.
I had a t-shirt line called ‘Rich Girls’. It wasn’t about the dollar sign, it was about rich in knowledge, rich in life, you know. Not lacking anything, not broken, being full of everything. Being full of life, full of energy, full of love, and that’s what I teach them. Even throughout this process, as hard as it’s been, you can’t hold stuff in. You can’t hold bitterness in ’cause it will eat you up. So just moving, experiencing, whatever it is. Good, bad, hurt, pain, joy, happiness, experience it to the fullest, and then keep going. I know under my tutelage, they’ve been able to move like that. Away from me, it’s very hard for them ’cause I nursed all three for 13 months. We have a bond that’s not to be broken.
- Keep up with Pilar on Twitter: @PilarSanders
Interview by Mara The Hip-Hop Socialite, Managing Editor